Have no fear...

I am a fortunate person, in as much as I can say I have very good friends, friends who care about me (for some crazy reason,) quite a lot.
Which is lovely and I'm not complaining. But it is, at times fare to say, they care too much! Well meant intentions rule their perspectives.
My friends worry about my choices, my options and the consequences. But I really need them to understand that those things are indeed mine.
I own my mistake's, they are mine to make - and they are mine to learn from. When I defend things, maybe it's because I see more sides to it than people seem to realise that there are, and not because I am fighting blindly.
My friends want to protect my heart - but what is the point in protecting something that is supposed to be used. You can't truly open yourself to love anything if you are to scared to risk exposure and pain - and I want it, I am exposed, my heart has always been worn on my sleeve - this means it is scarred, and worse for wear, at times maybe a bit weary... but isn't it worth it? for the lessons learnt? I know it will be hurt again, and I know it will heal again. I will learn from this.
You may see me making what you consider to be 'the same mistake', but how can it be... when such different factors are involved. I am a different person, the people around me are different, as is every aspect of my life.... everything and everyone is constantly evolving.

I love these people who want to protect me, but I can protect myself. I love them because they want to, but more so, because I know that when I have not protected myself well enough, they will help me heal - as they always have. And as I would like to think I have done for them.
But, my friends - I mostly need you to understand that I have probably already considered your perspectives, your probable thoughts on my situation and so on, and while I always respect you, and what you say, you need to do the same for me. Understand I enter situations with eyes wide, cautious, but adventurous. Hopeful, but weary. I almost always know what I'm going into, I have an idea of how it'll play out alot... but sometimes I'm wrong. Sometimes people can surprise you.. if you let them. But either way, they are my choices to make, and good or bad, learn from.

Hunter S Thompson summed it up best with his quote (Which, I believe applied to the heart and soul - as much as they body) - A quote I will have inked on me, so I never forget.....

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”